Facebook Free February

I've deactivated my facebook account for the month of February. Maybe longer.

I was definitely hooked. Facebook can be a nasty habit. But there's more to my month long abstention than my little web addiction. (see? Here I am blogging. except HERE, I know no one is reading it...)

I joined facebook to reconnect with old friends and stalk former high school classmates. C'mon. Doesn't everybody? And reconnect I did. College, high school, former co-workers, old neighbors, childhood playmates and their neighbors...

My dog has her own page.

And three years ago, facebook was definitely more personal. A few businesses had pages, but mostly it was people telling funny stories about their day, or their kids. It was a personal connection. A pithy turn of phrase, a string of puns. Fun exchanges.

My dissatisfaction began gradually. I realized I was voluntarily being advertised to - inviting spam into my "news" feed by "liking" businesses. Sure, I "liked" the business, but it doesn't mean I care if the business owner walked her dog that morning and it had a runny poop. So now, while I "like" hundreds of businesses, 75% of them have been hidden from my basic view.

And friends started posting less about themselves and more links to articles (which are interesting, especially when good discussions follow) and even more links to music videos and such.

I began feeling like I was putting out pieces of myself to the great unknown. Did the recipients care? Did they value my sharing of myself? Did they hide me? All I felt was, they weren't reciprocating. Sure, I'd get a few good comments on some posts - sometimes from left field - people I was certain weren't reading my stream. Others could be counted on to comment on *everything*.

Often I wanted to do a weeding post - HELLOOOO! Are you reading this? and delete everyone who didn't respond. But then I get scared that maybe no one would respond. And then I'd be a facebook loser.

But I knew I had people who followed me because they'd say something to me about a post even if they didn't comment. The Lurkers. And those are the ones I'm most disillusioned with. I added them as friends as an extension of our friendship. To enhance our friendship. So I could learn more about them and they could learn more about me. But it all felt very one-sided, with a few wonderful exceptions.

I have a few gems on my friend list that I've grown to know much better through facebook. And they're the reason I'll probably go back on March 1st. They keep it interesting, and I hope I give back to them in the same way.

Keeping in touch in a post-facebook February will take a bit more effort. I'll send more personal emails (letters??!) and maybe even pick up the phone.

Crazy talk.